The Wrath of Sentient Frogs
Untitled | Caliean Fandino | Pencil
The Wrath of Sentient Frogs by Kevin Marshall
Frogs. They’re everywhere. The president, the owners of businesses, even my so-called wife is a sentient frog! They’re watching me. The frogs are all planning on how to deal with me. I need to protect the last human survivors.
“Alicia,” my wife, called, “Honey! Kids! Ribbit. Dinner!”
“Coming,” I said, anxiously scurrying to the table.
Tonight is my last night with my family. The world was calling me, begging for rescue, and I picked up the phone. I don’t know how I’ll do it, but I must.
“Ribbit. Are you okay, Leo? You seem worried,” Alicia deceived.
“I’m okay, I just need some rest,” I told her.
I excused myself from the table, packed essential belongings, and ran away. I only made it about three blocks before the froggy sheriff stopped me. I heard helicopter frogs in the distance, likely after me. They’re onto me!
“Ribbit,” the frogster called, “I’m gonna need to search you. Got a call about a potential terrorist.”
I slapped that frogger in the face and sprinted away. In response, the green amphibian chased me on foot, but was too slow as all he could do was jump up and down. He tried to use his long, sticky tongue to grab ahold of me. Unfortunately for him, I was already outside the range of his tongue. After I ran around the corner, I ran into a dark, abandoned house. The helicopter frogs were getting louder and louder, and eventually I heard the ribbit sirens from the frog-mobiles driving around, searching for me.
“The longer you hide, the longer you’re going to spend in the froggy detention center, you worthless primate!” the amphibian said.
The last human I encountered told me of the horrors in froggy prison. His name was Ethan, and he was held without charge in the froggy detention center. They beat him, verbally abused him, and made him eat peas. It sent shivers down my timbers and my spine.
“Ribbit. You guys see where that dude went?” yelled the sheriff with urgency laced in his words.
“Chuf. Ribbit. Haven’t seen him since he slapped you, sir,” said the helicopter frogs.
After rocking back and forth on the ground, I spotted a colorful object in the room. It looked like it was in an abandoned library. I walked up to the object to inspect it and realized it was a book, Time Travel for Dummies. The book seemed unworldly, like it was created by God himself. I opened the book, and the first page left me shocked. Time travel occurs constantly at a rate of sixty seconds per minute. Wow! In order to change the rate of time travel, you must amuse yourself, as time flies when you’re having fun. The book was the work of a genius! If it wasn’t written by God, it had to be something similar to God. If you want to go back in time, you must do something you despise. Mathematically, this would equate to time flies when you’re having fun * emotion positive or emotion negative, as the negative emotion reverses the effect.
After closing the book, I looked outside to see if they were still looking for me. As soon as the frog-authorities left the scene, I pulled out my phone and started reading some really bad short stories. I read Fight for Freedom, Man of His Word, and A Christmas War, all by Kevin Marshall, for 22 minutes, which was the equivalent of 22 years time traveled. God, that dude sucks. When I got off my phone, suddenly the building was lively. There were people everywhere reading books and using computers. I rushed to my feet and enthusiastically asked a woman what the date was.
“Um, February. Can I help you?” she said.
“And the year?” I asked.
“2023,” she slowly said, confused.
“Thank you so much!”
I ran out of the door, wearing nothing but clothes, and jumped in the air, celebrating my success. However, it wasn’t over yet; I still had to stop the frog-tack. I ran to the nearest gym to arm myself with these guns. I fiercely trained my body on all the machines. While trying to pick up a nickel I dropped, I had a cramp in my forearm, which somehow led to the nickel floating up into my hand. I looked around, dropped the nickel, and did it again to make sure my eyes didn't deceive me.
“Yes!” I proclaimed to everyone else, without context.
Everyone was staring at me throwing the nickel around like a boomerang. I ran out of the door, wearing nothing but clothes, and jumped in the air, celebrating my success. However, it wasn’t over yet, I still had to stop the frog-tack.
While outside, I looked around for a bank to get some more nickels. The city was lively and colorful. Hundreds of cars drove on the street and thousands of pedestrians. There were skyscrapers left and right, and vibrant buildings distributed evenly. There was a large unused blue plastic bucket and two twenty dollar bills on the ground which I took on the way. I didn’t feel bad, because whoever dropped it was long gone. After around fifteen minutes, I stumbled across a bank.
“Hello sir, how can I help you today?” the teller told me.
“I’d like to exchange this bill for nickels, please,” I told him.
“No problem sir, however this may take awhile as your request involves 800 nickels,” he said.
After the teller counted the nickels, he asked how I would be carrying them. I squatted and grabbed the bucket off the ground, and asked him to pour the nickels into it. I ran out of the door, wearing nothing but clothes, and jumped in the air, celebrating my success. However, it wasn’t over yet, I still had to stop the frog-tack. I looked around for a taxi, and in luck, saw one.
The Taxi driver asked, “Where would you like to go, sir?”
“To the nearest airport, please,” I told him.
Thinking back to Time Travel for Dummies, I started playing my favorite mobile game, Plants vs Frogs, in order to speed up the driving. All it took was a couple of seconds and we had already arrived.
“This is your stop, sir,” the driver said.
After getting out of the vehicle, I walked through the front door of the airport and purchased a plane ticket to Quebec. The lady at the desk asked me if I had any luggage, and I promptly put my four kilograms of nickels on the scale. The lady told me that I would need a fully sealed container, to which I replied by taking my jacket off and wrapping it around the bucket and tying it to make it stay.
The plane was incredible. In my time, I had never been in one, as the frogs destroyed every real plane. The takeoff was like a rollercoaster, with intense acceleration. The flight at random intervals gave me a feeling of butterflies, like we were falling. I couldn’t believe how much better people had it in 2023. The planes we had in my day were fake.
After landing in Quebec, I called an Uber and had myself driven to the forest where the first sentient frog attack happened. It was time to save the world. I hopped out of the car, wearing nothing but clothes, and jumped in the air, celebrating my success. However, it wasn’t over yet, I still had to stop the frog-tack.
“Are you okay, bro? You seem like you’re on something,” the Uber driver said to me.
“I think it is you that is on something. On my meat, that is. Trust me, you’re not that guy pal. Just move along, pipsqueak. Little twerp,” I snapped.
“Alright man, just stay safe out here,” he cautioned.
I jogged until I found a source of water. A source of water, I found. Utilizing physics, I used my telekinesis on the nickels and mashed them together at such high pressure that the temperature increased to 2,615 degrees Fahrenheit. After they melted, I cast the nickels into a large bucket which I could use with telekinesis. In appreciation of my genius bucket, I ran around in circles, wearing nothing but clothes, and jumped in the air, celebrating my success. However, it wasn’t over yet, I still had to stop the frog-tack.
The smoke could be seen in the air. It looked like a squid had released its ink into the air. The smoke weirdly smelled like smoke. Using telekinesis, I carried myself in the bucket and flew to the source of the flames. At a rate of twenty times per second, I poured water on the fire. In a matter of minutes, the fire went out. However, it was too late, as there was already enough smoke to smother the resistance that hid out in New York City.
In New York City, the resistance leader yelped, “Get down! It’s the sentient frog smoke!”
The smoke filled the city. The sky was yellow like sulfur, and the air was painful. Looking around, there were hundreds of bodies of people in the resistance. All their years of preparation for the war was in vain, as the movement was halted in minutes. The potential reinforcements I may have needed were no longer available because of my failure.
Back in Quebec, however, I ran away from the smoke, wearing nothing but clothes, and jumped in the air, celebrating my success. However, it wasn’t over yet, I still had to stop myself from getting jumped by frogs that jump.
“Ribbit. Hey! You! Get on the ground!” one of the terrorist amphibians yelled.
“It is you who will be on the ground when I’m done with you boy!” I barked back.
It was finally time for the showdown. Man versus frog. Human versus amphibian. Humanity versus croakers. Good versus evil. Skin color of all kinds versus green. Dry skin vs wet skin. The fight was on.
I pulled out my phone and went back in time to get my nickels back in their original form, hiding them in my sleeve. Then, I went Back to The Future to the sentient frog showdown.
“Your time is up, you slimy green amphibian,” I told the froggy.
“Yeah right, punk! We will end you!” that frog told me.
“Oh? You and what army?” I asked him.
He laughed in my face, and shortly after, a horde of helicopter frogs flew in from every direction and landed in a circle formation around me. They too began hysterically laughing in my face. Little did they know, I had a nickel or two up my sleeve. The 800 nickels burst out of my shirt, turning me into a grenade. I propelled the nickels around the air through the helicopter frogs like a knife through butter. It was a bloody massacre, innit. The tables had turned on those froggies, as I made the helicopter frogs drop like flies being hunted by frogs. After only a few seconds, all of the helicopter frogs were dead. I ran away from the dead helicopter frogs, and jumped in the air, wearing nothing but clothes, celebrating my success.
However, it wasn’t over yet, though, as soon I heard the screeching sound of jet toads from the Isfroggy Defense Force. My nickels couldn’t puncture the strong skin of jet toads, leaving me nearly defenseless. I crushed some of my nickels into molten metal and launched them at the jet toads, but it was no use, as they evaded it. I then covered myself in nickels as a wall to protect myself, but it was also of no use, as they simply wrapped their tongues around me to restrain me.
“My nickel, you’re coming with us. Your little quirk could prove useful to us,” the apparent commander of the frogs ordered me.
“Please,” I begged for my life.
“Really nickel? You really think we’re just gonna let you go because you asked? Nickel please,” he replied.
They brought me to their headquarters and psychologically tortured me. They verbally abused me, forced me to do drug trials for their sick frog kind, and made me eat brussel sprouts. The longer I stayed, the more and more insane I felt. One night I laid in bed, and it felt like it was my last night alive. It was over.
To my surprise, I woke up in a pleasant setting. My family was standing around me, and they were crying. There were no sentient frogs, finally.
“You guys saved me from those frogs! Thank the lord!” I exclaimed. I hopped out of the bed, wearing nothing but clothes, and jumped in the air, celebrating my success. However, it wasn’t over yet, as I still needed an explanation.
“Yes, Leo, but not in the way you think,” a nurse in the room with me said, “You were having another severe psychotic episode, season two. You need to keep taking your Haloperidol. And why did you stop coming to cognitive behavioral therapy?”
I couldn’t believe it. All of my effort was for nothing. It was all a waste of time.
Alicia eased, “I’m sorry, Leo. But at least you weren’t actually captured by frogs. Ribbit.”
I hopped back into bed, wearing nothing but clothes, mourning my failure. However, it wasn’t over yet, as I still needed to escape.
