Broken Fatherhood - Troy From Fences

Head of the Household

Broken Fatherhood- Troy from Fences 

By Lydia Wosen

A mind trapped in a cage, a cage made of melded steel poisoned with detrimental ideals

A mind that wanted to escape from itself, that hated itself more than others hated it

A mind that thought it made right decisions, saw the consequences then realized its mistakes

A mind that wasn’t a fortune teller, nor had the common ability to think things through

A mind that was as stubborn as a boulder on the shore, the surrounding waves crashing against it, begging it to move even a little for the unrealized betterment of others

A mind that unconsciously became what it hated the most, what it desperately ran away from

An injured heart, injured by a pre-developed illogical confusion of “duty” and “love.”

An injured heart that couldn’t comprehend the unconscious responsibilities of being a father

An injured heart that couldn’t see the gaping hole it had right in the middle of itself

An injured heart that tried to give, but bruised, and intended to caress, but cut

An injured heart that laughed at death, gladly stood by it, fought it and lost to it with a smile

A plague of repercussions that hounded him up until death finally dragged him away

A father, mother and son that lived with different meanings of “family”

One believed it to be a contractual obligation, purely fiscal, with autonomy being the main ingredient

Another believed it an unconscious bond that should have reaped intangible rewards

And the other not sure what it was supposed to be, but molded by what was experienced and observed

A life of a protagonist that mistakenly played the antagonist

A life of a thousand ups with ten thousand more downs

A life that recycled the pain in which racism and inferiority inflicted on him, into the next generation

A life that died alone with a shattered heart and disassembled family, that drove around a garbage truck full of regrets

A life… That’s all he was… That’s all we all get.